First time Alesandra Madam’s Husband incorporated AI into their relationship The year 2024 was late.
She had forgotten what she was supposed to be doing “nightly kneeling ritual,” He then asked ChatGPT The best way to discipline a child. It is important to use the large-language version of the model. “a two-in-one punishment,” she says—write 100 lines of “I will remember to kneel for my Dom every night” While kneeling all the time.
The couple began exploring kink in their marriage 15 years ago—they are in a dominant-submissive relationship—the AI-generated punishment was new territory for them.
Madison, who lives in Los Angeles and is 44 years old, said she had come to see AI as “a powerful enhancement tool” For kink. “A lot of the times in dom-sub dynamics, when the submissive misbehaves—if it’s consented to—you will have a punishment. You want something specific to fit the crime, basically. It’s like a fresh set of eyes on your relationship.”
AI represents a unique evolution in how power is distributed for people into bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism—BDSM. As everyone WIRED interviewed for this article noted, the lifestyle structure is based on consent, communication, trust, and safety. AI can be a good option for people who are struggling with their trust, or simply need a place to talk about BDSM without being judged.
“I’ve gotten value out of AI helping me understand myself better as a submissive. I sometimes ask it questions or describe something that feels confusing to me and ask it to help me understand,” A user made a post in the r/SubSanctuary Subreddit is a place where you can discuss topics such as impact playFeelings “being owned,” The following are some examples of how to get started: how to move on When the relationship is over. Madison says that AI doms can appeal to subs in different ways. They are always available, easily customizable—”You can make them playful or sadistic,” In a note, she said: video—and there is low risk to exploring for newbies.
Not everyone agrees. AI-doms are criticized in the same subreddit for being unreliable. “hollow entertainment,” “dangerous,” The following are some examples of how to get started: “dystopian.” “It can feel like a checklist,” says San Francisco–based sex educator Amp SomersA 36 year old AI who alternates between the dom role and sub-roles, explains what an AI dom demands.
The market has boomed as the debates intensify. Joi AI is one of the many services—along with Character.AI, Replika, and Soulmaite—that let users create and customize chatbots for BDSM role-play. The company claims to be an online role-playing service. “AI-lationships” Platform and an alternative to dating apps. “user base has grown five times in 2025 compared to 2024.” There are several sexworkers, including Alix Lynx The following are some examples of how to get started: Jenna StarrThe company has declined to disclose the exact number of users. Also, developers are racing to create applications Role-playing chatbots are available. “not just erotic content spam, but something focused on immersive, intelligent conversation with a dominant persona.” You can also read about it here Oxy shopa leading online retailer of BDSM gear for men who enjoy wearing chastity cages, is now offering an AI-driven system. “BDSM chat” For members, this allows them indulge all sorts of dominant fantasies. “Surrender to Mandy” You can also find out more about “Submit to Mike,” This page promotes the product.
Porn is a very passive activity. “an AI chatbot allows people a forum to talk about, express, and articulate their sexual fantasies,” Carolina Bandinelli says she is an Associate Professor at University of Warwick who focuses her research on digital love culture. “The idea that you can program your domination exactly the way you want. That is one of the fantasies underpinning the relationship between humans and AI—the fact that we can shape and model our partner.”
